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MAN CHECKS IN
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It all started simply enough.
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I recalled that in primary school we recorded the weather in a calendar pinned up in the wall at the front of the class. There were roughly 30 kids in a class, and roughly 30 days in a month, so you’d look forward to it being your day to look outside and draw a cloud with falling teardrops of rain. There was the odd day that featured a sun shining. Drawing those made you feel very special. But mostly it was clouds and rain. Time moved a lot slower back then. Getting through from Halloween to Christmas took about a year - maybe two (if there were no dumps of snow to make everything fun).
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REFLECTO-GLPYHS
So one day, during my sporadic morning journaling - 10 mins of trying to wake the brain to say hello to the day - I drew a little weather symbol. I wondered about how the weather related each day to my internal energy. Intending to be creative every day as I do - my job depends on it! - when I have energy, I can create all manor of weird and wonderful things. Time flies. Ideas appear before my eyes, and with a chuckle my pen obliges to bring it into being. I even like some of what I create!
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But when I’m flat, I got nothin’...
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So I also drew a little battery to record the level of brain energy I felt I had that morning. A battery of four parts, one for each level of charge. And now that I look back over the last few months, I’ve only felt fully charged with brain energy once. Usually I’m half full. Once in a while, I’m totally flat.
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Then I added a little doodle showing whether I had done any exercise that morning. As my day is often spent in front of a screen, I try to either run, walk or do a little youtube yoga every morning - just to get the blood moving.
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ANXIETY vs REALITY
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One morning, I was aware that for whatever reason (it’s often not immediately obvious) I had more anxiety than usual. So I drew a little o-meter indicating where I thought my anxiety was at. Often, if I’ve got an upcoming performative session - a workshop, chat with a new client - or an overwhelming workload, I can get a bit anxious. The fear of the day ahead. The uncertainty of it all.
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And in wondering about my anxiety, I wondered this: Does my anxiety about the uncertain future tally up with the reflective reality of the past? So I asked myself a simple question: how did I think yesterday went? What would I score it out of 10?
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And in doing so I discovered something so obvious that it is still dribbling its way through my frontal lobes. My days tend to be 7’s, 8’s and 9’s. Because when I think about it, there’s a lot in a day that goes well, that’s interesting, enjoyable. Things I've created, things to be thankful for. In truth, there’s often a large gap between my gut anxiety of the day ahead and the reality of the day as it plays out. Indeed the things I’m most anxious about often end up being the highlights of my day. Hmm.
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Even though there’s a chance that over time I’ll extend these reflecto-glyphs so that it takes me two hours to get started in the morning, I quite like the little rhythm that I’ve found. Saying hello to the morning, and adopting the curious position of “well what have we here?” to the day ahead. Otherwise, I’m a sucker for the first distraction or burning issue that the day presents, and a hostage to the irrational anxieties that lie at the back of my head...
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So don't forget to check-in! Especially if you want the comfortable seat with the extra legroom.
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