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This Gay Man Considers the “Utensils” of Getting Older
We need to be aware of our hidden biases, prejudices, and phobias!
“My Friend Started Using a Walker and I ‘Othered’ Him” is an excellent essay by fellow “Prism & Pen” writer Joe Guay. He discusses his reactions to attending a party where a friend is newly having to use a walker and the negatives the author attached to that. It was important for me to read it the day after my 80th birthday, and it led to the motivation for my current essay.
Often we hold beliefs from our youth … and are not aware of them, do not consider them and change, or inconsiderately decide to continue to hold on to them! Knowing a person who now needs to use a walker is one of those situations.
I, too, have thought thoughts similar to the ones Joe discussed. Getting older is said to be a “hard pill to swallow!” What makes it a little easier is when one realizes that they, too, may need to take similar “pills” in their near or eventual future, and so they must reconsider the implications of their beliefs if they hope to take the pill with a little apple juice to make it sweeter.
Joe’s essay helped me add the “utensils” needed by people as they get older to my thinking and processing: observing my prejudices, bringing them into my awareness, and thereby making the past biases, prejudices, and negative emotions easier to delete, change, or accept.
Interesting to realize that, as an 80-year-old senior citizen, in some ways I am still age-phobic and an ageist. So, back to the “processing” process to take a closer look at why I hold these ageist ideas and how I might change them for myself and for others.
Not long ago, I realized that I was a gay homophobe. In an essay, I looked at a number of homophobic ideas I still held since my youth and how inappropriate they were at the time and currently are. I have changed since.
