Eventually there will be studies, falsifiable theses with quantifiable results: Covid’s effect on suicide rates, on divorce rates, on school participation, on mortality, on depression and anxiety, on economic output. But none of them will get it. No study could ever capture the lived experience of the pandemic, its peculiar oppressive texture, the bracketing of time, the asterisk hovering over our lives. For the vast majority of the world, covid remains a living hell. But as the mass death retreats from a few pockets, we, the blessed ones, can allow ourselves to assess. What is it that we just lived through? What are we coming out of?