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A few weeks ago, I went to an event at work put on by The Disney Institute, the professional development arm of The Walt Disney Company. I spent two hours in a ballroom full of colleagues learning a bunch of things about how seriously Disney takes customer service. It’s a well known fact that Disney refers to all of its employees as cast members, and everyone is encouraged to put on an act and exemplify that quintessential Disney brand, whether they’re in a costume or driving a tram car. That idea stuck with me, and I left the event thinking about acting and authenticity.
I had a small crisis of conscience. I strongly value authenticity, vulnerability, and maintaining a positive attitude. Keeping all three of those boxes checked doesn’t seem possible. If I hate it, but I pretend to be fine with it for the sake of my own attitude (and sanity), am I being sincere? Am I acknowledging my feelings? Am I lying to my coworkers and my boss? Does it matter?
I decided to try something: I’d smile and be pleasant when I felt dread about unavoidable things at work. When I had to do something that I absolutely wished I could never do again, I’d do it with a smile- like it absolutely tickled me to be providing this service to others that really made me wish I was prepping for a colonoscopy instead. I had nothing to lose.
What used to be awkward encounters and exchanges with others turned into pleasant conversations. I greeted people with a genuine, crinkly-eye smile and a cheerful hello. Do you know how hard it is to be indifferent to someone pouring pleasantries out of their face? It’s almost impossible. Humans are hardwired to mirror what those around them are doing, and by oozing niceties, you can set the tone of an interaction. By being pleasant instead of my usual moody self, short yet necessary visits to my office turned into nice moments of human interaction. You know how there are a bunch of studies that say if you smile, you’ll genuinely feel better? They’re not lying. I left these moments feeling better about my day, and my previous feelings of dread were replaced with thoughts of, “Well that was nice.”
There are crap parts of any job and an infinite number of things to dislike about work. It’s completely normal, and let’s be real, expected to have negative feelings at and about work from time to time. Balance requires us to not only go up, but come back down. You’re certainly entitled to your feelings and opinions, but what you do about them makes a huge difference not only in your experience at work, but how others perceive you. By choosing to stay positive most of the time, and yes, putting on a show at work, you’re not only doing yourself a favor, but everyone around you benefits too. It becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.
If you find yourself getting bogged down by unavoidable tasks or situations at work, I challenge you to spend the next two weeks smiling when you feel like grumbling. It won’t be easy at first, and yes, you’ll feel like a complete fraud. As time goes by, it will get easier to re-frame your negative feelings into positive ones. As they say in one of my favorite books, Gratitude and Trust by Paul Williams and Tracey Jackson, “Something needs to change and it’s probably me.” When you’re stuck dealing with something you can’t change, the only thing left to do is change you.
