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‘To think that you look all right is egomania in a girl, but lovable in a boy.’ Photograph: Antonio Saba/Getty Images/Cultura RF
‘To think that you look all right is egomania in a girl, but lovable in a boy.’ Photograph: Antonio Saba/Getty Images/Cultura RF

One in 10 men think they are hot – women need that confidence, too

This article is more than 4 years old
Suzanne Moore

Almost five times as many male respondents as female ones told YouGov they are good-looking. That’s no surprise, considering girls are trained to bat off compliments

Men think they are better-looking than women. Of course they do.

This has nothing to do with reality. I have just been on a beach in England. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, after all. Anyway, for some reason, YouGov asked 2,000 adults whether they would describe themselves as good-looking. While 9% of men considered themselves handsome, only 2% of women thought they were beautiful.

I can’t help wondering about the crossover between that 9% of men and the 12% who thought they could take a point off Serena Williams.

We women could do with a little of this cockiness, if you ask me. Women feel more insecure than men and inspect every area of their bodies – legs, breasts, lips – forever comparing ourselves against some ideal, often someone whose job depends on them looking beautiful. This is a no-win situation. Sure, I know the pressure is on guys, too, but, watching something like Queer Eye, you see that all most men need for a boost is a beard trim and some clothes that fit them properly.

All of this is to do with confidence. Girls are trained from early on to bat off compliments. To think that you look all right is egomania in a girl, but lovable in a boy.

As women age, we may well feel happier in ourselves, but we are even less inclined to see ourselves as attractive. Not one woman over 55 in this survey described herself as beautiful. Isn’t that sad?

Instead, in these days of body positivity, where at last we see different shapes and sizes, still the only older women who are deemed acceptable are the likes of Andie MacDowell and Lauren Hutton, who we are told are somehow brave for being photographed. Rightio? Ageing models are something to aspire to, I suppose, if you are a young model. But the rest of us still scrub up well.

Suzanne Moore is a Guardian columnist

The headline on this article was amended on 17 September 2019 to better reflect the results of the YouGov survey mentioned.

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