'My Mom Said You Guys Have To Let Me Play,' Defiant Colin Kaepernick Tells Kids Playing Flag Football At Park
Politics · Dec 3, 2019 · BabylonBee.com

RIVERDALE, GA - Shortly after his workout video plan failed, free agent Colin Kaepernick took a walk around town to clear his mind.

Luckily, Kaepernick stumbled upon a pickup game of flag football some kids were playing at a local park. 

"Hey guys, can I play?" Kaepernick said, jogging over. They begrudgingly allowed him to stand in the lineup as teams were being picked, but as kid after kid was chosen, Kaepernick started to get nervous. 

"I pick... Timmy!" the yellow team captain said, referring to one boy in a wheelchair. Timmy excitedly rolled over and high-fived the captain of his new team. 

"Aw, come on!" Kaepernick shouted angrily. Finally, it was between him and resident tomboy Patty. "I'll take Patty," the red captain said, leaving just Kaepernick. Patty snickered and muttered, "Loser," as she jogged over, stepping on Kaepernick's foot. 

"Hey, you did that on purpose!" he whined. "Come on guys, let me plaaaa-yaaay!"

"Sorry, man -- you'd make the teams uneven," one kid said, shrugging, as everyone lined up for the first kickoff. "Better luck next time."

Kaepernick called his parents, who reportedly said the mean boys should let him play.

"Guys, my mom said you have to let me play," he said, boldly standing in the middle of the field, refusing to budge until the kids let him on one of their teams. "She just told me."

"Guys? Guuuuuuuuys!"


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