Please ensure Javascript is enabled for purposes ofwebsite accessibilityInside the Story: Music eases the pain of a father going blind

Inside the Story: Music eases the pain of a father going blind


Inside the Story: Music eases the pain of a father going blind (Photo: KUTV)
Inside the Story: Music eases the pain of a father going blind (Photo: KUTV)
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(KUTV) "I love music."

Derrick Boudwin, 35, has learned that life can throw you all sorts of musical notes.

About a year and a half ago, he discovered a hidden talent in writing and composing music. He's since released two music videos and a new album. His songs reflect real life—real struggles from his own experience.

"Every single song on the album is based on something factual," Boudwin said. "So everything in there is real—it's raw."

And his musical talents couldn't have come at a more critical time.

"It has possibly made the difference between life and death with me."

The reason is a diagnosis in Boudwin's eyes.

"I have retinitis pigmentosa," Boudwin said. That basically means he will lose his sight. The blindness starts with the peripheral vision and moves inward. "The eventual prognosis is blindness."

For this young father of a beautiful family, the thought of losing sight of his wife Cami, 6-year-old son Patrick, 4-year-old daughter Nora, and 20-month-old son Lincoln is almost too much to bear.

"My biggest fear is that I won't be able to be the husband and father that I always wanted to be my entire life," he said.

Hence the name of his album: "Ever Dimming Room."

"I see you in my dreams even though I’m awake and all I can see are my own mistakes; I just want to see you one more time," are some of his lyrics.

Boudwin says sometimes he runs his fingers across his kids faces in hopes of memorizing what they look like.

"I’m kind of hoping that this is the braille for my children's faces—that I will be able tell who they are by just putting their hand on my face," he said.

His wife Cami Boudwin said that they fight, "a lot of battles to keep our chins up."

She admits it hasn't been easy seeing her husband go blind.

"Maybe a little bit in a selfish way, but I want him to be able to see me and to see our kids," she said.

The blindness started when Derrick Boudwin was just 18, but it didn't really get bad until he was about 25.

"That kind of took the life out of him," Cami Boudwin said.

Derrick Boudwin went into an extreme state of depression and anxiety.

"It ended up effecting my emotional state much more than I ever thought," he said.

That's when his wife suggested he do something with his musical talents. It worked. The music wasn't a cure, but became a powerful force of healing.

She said that the music, "kind of brings a spark back into his eyes that's been gone for a little while."

"When I sing these songs I remember why I sing them, and I’m able to sing them with my whole heart with all my emotion," Derrick Boudwin said.

For more about Derrick Boudwin and his music, visit his website.