Do you remember how cool you felt as a teenager when you convinced your parents to let you borrow one of their cell phones? Sure, it may have been kind of bulky with audio quality like a walkie-talkie. But it wasn’t like asking to borrow a toy; it was a serious device, and you had permission to use it.
Or maybe you remember the screech of dial-up internet and begging your siblings to get off the phone so you could IM your friends.
Whatever your relationship to technology was like growing up, it’s safe to say that it’s evolved since then. You might even be reading this on your smartphone — something your younger self may never have imagined.
The new Millennials (members of Generation Z) don’t have to imagine what phones are capable of. In fact, 73 percent of teens in the U.S. have smartphones, and they’re not just calling Mom and Dad for rides home. They’re on social, watching videos, and even creating original content — all from their own phones.
Now, this isn’t one of those articles where I reminisce about how different things were “back in my day.” Times have changed since then, and that’s how it should be. That evolution is natural.
But as the parent of young children and the leader of a tech-enabled content marketing company, I think a lot about the role of technology in my life (and my family’s lives).
You can look up any number of articles about how dangerous screen time is and the effects of tech on developing kids. Obviously, you can’t just sit your kids in front of the TV for a weeklong movie marathon of “Frozen,” no matter how much they beg you. But you also can’t hide from tech, either. Technology isn’t going away, and raising kids around so much of it means parenting has to join the 21st century.
Entrepreneur Parents, I’m Looking at You
As an entrepreneur, my work requires tech — and all the productive benefits that come with it. But as my daughters grow, I have this worry that my own habits might affect what they think is normal.
Entrepreneurial habits have the potential to create the expectation for children that complete reliance on tech and extended screen time is totally fine. I started realizing this when my 3-year-old daughter refused to eat dinner with us because she was too busy watching “Elsa and Catwoman Walk on Spiderman” videos on YouTube. If she sees me behind a screen telling her to “hold on a minute” because I have to finish something, she actually applies that to her world of weird videos.
I’ve learned that because entrepreneurs and leaders use technology so much, they have a unique opportunity to teach their kids about it and how it fits into their lives.
Personally, as a leader, it’s hard for me to take time off. I’m afraid of missing out on an opportunity for my company, so I end up working quite a bit. Without technology to boost my productivity, I’d probably work even more. Tech helps me do parts of my job better and faster, and that’s why I use it.
That’s what I want to teach my kids that while technology can help you, you can’t let it control your life. You have to find a responsible balance between screen time and face time. And as parents, it’s our job to teach them how.
Raising Children for the Future
As a leader who uses technology daily (maybe even constantly), you have a unique perspective on tech to share with your kids, and it’s important you teach them how tech can fit into their lives. Here are some tips, from one business leader to another, to help show your kids what a healthy relationship with tech can look like:
1. Model moderation. If you’ve ever heard a kid drop the F-bomb (or any curse word), you know that children are quick to model their parents’ behavior. Your media habits are no different. If your computer spends more time in your lap than your kid does, it’s time to reconsider how you’re spending your time.
So exercise some self-control when you’re home, and keep the tech away. What I like to do is work during work hours and enjoy family time when I’m home. Then once my kids go to sleep, I’m able to finish up any last-minute projects without losing time with them.
2. Talk about the why. Hard-and-fast rules about technology usage can be a great thing: no screens after 9 p.m., no phones during dinner, etc. I won’t argue with that. But you can’t just say “no” and expect your kids to really get it or even listen to you.
Actually talk about the role of technology in their lives instead of defaulting to the idea that kids will just figure it out. Discuss the good and the bad of tech and the “why” behind your rules if you want your kids to understand.
3. Create tech safeguards. Maybe your kids are way too young to fully understand the “why.” They don’t get how too much TV or tech could ever be a bad thing. When that’s the case, boundaries can help. Ironically, more technology (in the form of parental controls) is a good solution.
What’s great about functions like passwords, time limits, safeguards, etc. is that you can determine ahead of time what sort of technology and content your kids are ready for. You can even set up a kind of tier system so they can up their tech intake over time, and you can explain the benefits as they explore. But don’t get too comfy; robots will never replace the parental eye.
4. Encourage gratitude and curiosity. Running a Google search is a luxury my children will never comprehend. They will never have to dig through encyclopedias or check the reference desk. Slow Wi-Fi will be their kryptonite; waiting even 20 seconds for a page to load feels like punishment.
Instead of reminding the kids in your life of how things were “back in your day,” encourage them to appreciate the tech they have and use it to their advantage. Help them see how much they can learn from access to the internet, and let it fuel their curiosity. When they understand the value of tech (beyond playing weird YouTube videos), they’ll more likely to approach it with a responsible mindset.
Technology isn’t a luxury for our children; it’s a staple. Their lives will always contain some form of microchip, and it’s on us to create the role technology will play in their lives. And while I don’t think robots are going to take over completely, I’d really like my kids to know how to disengage a self-aware super computer.
John Hall is the CEO of Influence & Co., a company that specializes in expertise extraction and knowledge management that is used to fuel marketing efforts.
