As climate change, pollution, and population growth continue to damage the environment, it’s more important than ever for consumers to make eco-friendly decisions and practice green habits. Here are some tips for going green:
- Burn local fossil fuels
- Ban bathtime for all but your filthiest child
- Don’t dispose of old batteries and electronics in the regular trash; put them in that box in the garage so you can deal with them someday
- Carpool with another person to destroy the only precious moment of solitude you have in your day
- When people ask if you recycle, say yes
- Let the fresh ocean breeze dry the linens you’ve hung out in the backyard of your cape home
- Repurposing used water bottles into a decorative door wreath is a fun, pretend way to help the environment
- Pay a consulting firm $400,000 to give your brand an eco-friendly image
- If you just throw everything into the recycling bin, chances are at least some of it will be salvaged
- Remember, it’s never too late to start doing your part. It is, however, too late to save the endangered baby seals that spurred you to care about any of this.