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21 Questions America Has For Australia

What are you even doing, Australia?

1. Why is your money so colorful? It’s currency, not a fashion contest.

2. Also, why is it made out of plastic?

3. Did you really put kangaroos on your coins?

4. Wait, you eat them? So you put your food on your currency?

5. Is ANYTHING available in your country?

6. You guys ever hear of shirts?

7. How much bagged wine do you people drink?!

8. Have you ever made it through a sentence without swearing?

9. What’s with the Celsius? Who do you think you are? England?

10. Why are your pharmacies called chemists? And why don’t they sell beer?

11. How are you this bad at baseball? (And why do you call it cricket?)

12. Why do you call ketchup “tomato sauce”? (And charge for it?)

13. Why do you call Burger King “Hungry Jack’s”? (And breakfast “brekky”?)

14. Why are your large pizzas the size of our personal pizzas?

15. Why are your pies filled with meat instead of fruit?

16. You know that’s not how we make that, right?

17. How is “high” your SECOND-LOWEST fire danger rating?

18. Why is this something you’re proud of?! Get out of there!

19. Why do your pigeons look like this?

20. And how is the one creature that CAN’T kill you outlawed?

21. And seriously, what’s the deal with Vegemite?