The secret to happiness

You’d never guess it from the soaps, but we’re a pretty happy lot on the whole.

There are exceptions of course, such as people living under political oppression or extreme poverty. And many events in life do cause great misery, though usually only temporarily.

Bereavement, divorce, sickness, insecurity and unemployment, for example. But once you feel in control of your life, and have enough to keep body and soul together, things like income and possessions stop affecting how happy you are. So getting richer won’t make you happier.

Instead, it turns out that happiness is a choice. You can choose to be happy. To behave in ways that will make you happier. Regardless of your income!

Like for example, you should deliberately smile a lot. And learn to be more optimistic and outgoing, because that leads to better jobs, more friends, closer personal relationships, being healthier and living longer. You’ll also be happier if you get married, so long as you choose your partner carefully. Because the successfully married are consistently happier than the never married.

Stop holding grudges. Instead, forgive and forget and get on with life. Don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future. Instead, immerse yourself in whatever you’re doing.

Be kind, speak well of others, and count your blessings instead of yearning for what you don’t have.

Choose to see problems as challenges and opportunities. Dream big, and don’t sweat the small stuff. And never make excuses or blame others for your problems. Instead, learn from your mistakes and don’t make them again!

Avoid thinking that you’re better than anyone else, or that someone else is better than you. Instead, focus on your own development. Choose your own destiny instead of letting others tell you how you should live your life.

Don’t worry about what other people think of you – though you should listen to what they have to say. In fact become a good listener. Keeping your mind open to others’ outlook on the world. But never seek anyone’s approval but your own.

Choose your friends carefully. Wise and optimistic people, who encourage you to achieve your goals and never lead you astray. And make time for your family. Especially your spouse and children.

You’ll be a lot happier if you get up early, and at the same time every morning! And if you learn to meditate or pray, eat wisely and take exercise. And to tell the truth. And live modestly. In a smaller house, driving smaller cars, spending less, saving more, owning fewer possessions and minimising clutter.

And accept life as it is. Because things are never “fair”. And some things just can’t be changed. So focus on what you can control and change it for the better.

Above all, recognise that pursuing individual wealth and status creates more anxiety than happiness. So don’t go that way. Instead live a simple life, devoted to helping others and building a better society. And then you’ll really be happy.

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